No.49: Attend Christmas Service at Indoor Stadium

Its amazing how time flies …

Its already end of year 2007, time of reflection and time for new resolutions and goals

Reflections .. still remember being with Eric and Wilson and my sis at Indoor Stadium at this time last year, Pastor Prince got us to declare 3 areas of our lives that we want blessings to happen for the new year.

I didnt take it seriously .. kinda was not totally healed yet, still half hearted to whether God is real, still full of resentment inside .. not daring to believe again ..

I remember clearly though, that Eric wrote down the 3 things he wanted for2007 in his mobile phone, and he is really on his way to fulfill them …

God is good … He really fulfills … though I didnt pin point out what I want, I am still unbelievably blessed … I have grown so much this year, not only being healed, but to the point of being able to support and heal others too … Its been a miracle what God has led me through ..

Another new year, another 3 areas for God’s blessings … 2008 … what will it bring?

My 3 wishes for 2008:

1. Have a smooth and enjoyable wedding celebration at Dec 2008, one that is memorable, meaningful and blesses everyone involved. May Papa bless us with good weather, efficient service personnel, positive and fun ”brothers” & “sisters”, toned and fit physique for both of us and not forgetting abundance of ang pao money for the event yeah

2. Clear direction in my career path, one that God has planned for me, that I find purpose and meaning in, and is something that I look forward to everyday. Maybe I am not listening hard enough, maybe I have not quieten down enough .. may Papa show me in ways that clears all my doubts His will for me …

3. To have a balanced life, managing all the important aspects well … there is just so much on my plate that its a challenge to juggle everything well, and 2008 is a year where I will happily fulfill them:

Relationship – continue to inspire, love, support and respect each other, focus out

Health – exercise, diet and supplements, adding on a beauty regime for this year

Family – have family dinner once a month, connect with mum once a week

Church – serve at Rock Kidz

Charity – serve at least 3 events for the year at club rainbow

Dance – maintain dance practices for rehearsals, design choreos to teach classes, upgrade with claribel and thru masters workshops

Financial – explore on how to make money work harder for me

Growth – staff one basic and one advance at asiaworks mid year

Eric: 2007 indeed is a very cool year.

The 3 things that I’ve committed to God in 2007 was

1. To be engaged to Sally at the end of the year (Complete)

2. Quaffs to begin operations and be profitable at the end of the year (Semi-complete)

3. To be serving in the New Creation Music Ministry. (Akan Datang aka Coming soon)

So the three things that I wanted, God has greatly helped me fulfilled half, and I totally believe that the other half is not completed becos, the time is not ripe. Thus it’s up to me to wait upon the Lord and see His hand move POWERFULLy in our lives.

And the 3 things in 2008 I’m trusting God to make happen are:

1. Quaffs to be in Japan and have tremendous success in Asia. With strong, interesting, creative user generated content and bring great value to our users’ lives

2. Have a superb foundation in an Investment portfolio which will serve me the rest of my life and Sally’s

3. To be serving in New Creation Church in the area of worship by singing and playing the guitar.

*4. (hahah, greedy, getting the 4th thing) To have one of the most memorable, romantic, happeningz wedding of all times, while getting to learn more and more abt my dearest Sally, and helping her to grow more.

No.48 : Watch Jap Anime together

Besides being a movie craze, my dear also loves Japanese anime like Naruto, Bleach etc ..

His “evil plan” succeeded when he played from the first episode and I got hooked to Naruto too :p now I am eagerly waiting for each new episode to come with matching enthusiasm

Its very cool to be doing something that we like together, and Naruto has indeed become one of our favorite look-forward-to doing activity

Long live Naruto !!

No. 47: Go Church Together

It may be just a casual activity for some, but hey this is the foundation of our relationship. Ha ha maybe surprising to come from me one year ago but now, I cant deny the presence of God that is being manifested so real in my life.

I used to just hear but now I see. With Him I find peace, the assurance that I am looked after, that I am loved. No matter what happens, I am not alone anymore, I have someone to rely upon. Used to be filled with so much fear, so crippling that I was not living life at all … in choosing to stay hidden, not risking anything, I end up wasting so much of my life being nothing.

 Now there is much joy, love, peace, perfected with occasional challenges that makes up this facinating life … and together with the partner that God has planned for me, I have learnt what it means to  treasure time, treasure relationships and live life with passion.

 In this negative chaotic world now, with our own human effort and frailities, we cannot guarantee that things will always end up as we want it to be … but with God, we are in a space where we can hold on to His promise that with Him we have everything.

Instead of waking up relunctantly to go church, now Sunday church service becomes my energy charger to prepare me for the new week, bringing fresh insight and hope that spreads to all that I touch.

Thanks Papa for bringing me closer despite my wilfulness and resentfulness, thanks for sending such a powerful angel to me, and thanks for the amazingly annoited messages from Pastor Prince and last but not least, thanks for loving me, loving us …

No.46: Go Exercise Together – Done

Impromptu call from godpa to go for Heavy Hands at his house .. incentive was to try out his cooking .. well good way to beat Monday blues I thought .. esp when he is so kind to offer to fetch me

 Asked Eric along half expecting that he cant make it .. but he surprised me by saying yes and even offered to fetch me ..

Quite a big group of HH people that night, we went running around the estate for warm up. Was surprised at my stamina .. guess the past dance sessions helped .. and the supplements have really made me healthier nowadays ..

Also enjoyed exercising together with Eric very much, though I think it may be not high impact enough for him, he didnt work out as much sweat as his usual gym session, thus minus point.

After a good sweat out session (for me), finally had our long awaited dinner. Godpa being a food connoiseur, I expected good food and I was not disappointed. Very simply prepared food that brought out the natural taste n texture of the ingredients. My favorite was the hot japanese noodle soup, really like the lightness and the “comfort food” feeling it gave me.

Wanna get the recipe from godpa ..

Looking forward to our 8 course dinner cooking plan from our to do list

No. 45: To The Singapore Zoo – Done!

Click here to view the photos

It’s been a quite a long time since Yuki and I went to the Singapore Zoo, and when our Arrow CareGroup leader Han planned for a Zoo outing, we were pretty psyched. So check out the photos.

For those who were wondering on the missing Arrow Graffiti photos, here’s the entry

No.44: Write up a list of what makes us feel loved and special and exchange it

Making Relationships Work

Feeling pensive .. seeing and hearing about relationship problems of friends around me ..

Breakups, divorces, betrayals, conflicts and resulting self-abuses, quite a sad sight to see ..

Even if one has gone through much experiences in life doesnt guarantee wisdom and definite success in happy relationships ..

Relationships .. ever complicated ever evolving .. where hard work doesnt guarantee success .. what then is the key to long-lasting fulfilling relationships???

Continuous learning, continous improvement, continous commitment not to give up .. life .. how fascinating ..

Another entry from godpa’s blog:

There are no such things as secrets to having a happy marriage. Most of what it takes to be happily married is in fact real love. Once there is real love between a man and a woman, the rest of the things will almost fall into place. That is not to say there won’t be some disagreements or cross words passed back and forth along your journey through life, as we are only human and certainly not perfect.But, having a genuine relationship full of real love helps to patch the holes in the sometimes rough road of matrimony.

Even though there are no secrets for being happily married, there are some basic rules every man and woman should keep in mind.

Rule #1
Communication is essential for any relationship to flourish, especially between a husband and wife. Share your feelings, your thoughts, and discuss your mutual plans for the future. Along with communicating, take the time to actually get to know your husband or wife, and continue to know them as the years pass by. You might think you know each other when you got married, but, as times goes by, especially if you married at an early age, you and your spouse both will mature, evolve and change. Time as well as the events that will happen to both of you throughout your married life will change your relationship as well as your outlook on life. Don’t be afraid of these changes, whether it happen to be your changing or your spouse’s at the time. Just remember to recognize those changes and communicate with your spouse about them.

Rule #2
Be loyal and show your spouse that you are devoted to them, and them only. Be faithful to them as well as supportive. Your spouse should be your confidante, your best friend, your safe haven in the storms of life as well as your exclusive lover. While you and your spouse will have loving relationships with family and friends, your marital relationship is exclusive and very special, and cannot be shared with anyone else.

Rule #3
Spend plenty of quality time together, but remember to allow each other to have ample time alone. Even though you are a married unit, and you will want to spend time together enjoying your favorite activities, or just sit together and relax at home, each of you is still a separate individual with certain likes and dislikes. You both need time alone to enjoy hobbies that you might enjoy, but your spouse doesn’t. Don’t think that because you are married, that you are joined at the hip and cannot do anything on your own. You both need equal time alone to think and organize your own thoughts or simply to wind down.

Rule #4
Be realistic about love and marriage, and especially, be realistic about your sex life. No matter how hard you may try, your marriage will not be perfect. As time goes by and changes occur in your lives together, your sexual relationship will also change. Most couples experience stars and skyrockets at the onset of their sexual relationship, but due to lack of time, energy, and other factors that come into play, things are bound to change. Probably the most common change will be that you and your spouse will not have sex as often as you did when you first were married. If this bothers you, or any other changes, talk openly and honestly to your spouse about your feelings and concerns.

Rule #5
Last, but certainly not least, work things out together. If you have a disagreement, which there are bound to be many throughout your married life, don’t let things get out of hand. Talk things over as calmly as possible and agree or learn to compromise on a solution to the problem, then kiss and make-up and go on. Don’t hold grudges against each other. And don’t make the mistake of taking each other for granted either. Life is full of uncertainties, but death is certain. None of us know exactly how much time we have on this planet, and how much time we have to enjoy the company of our spouses, so don’t waste it on not getting along!

10 TIPS FOR A GOOD RELATIONSHIP

1. Every morning make a conscious commitment to eliminate blame, criticism, and invalidation from your side of the relationship. If it leaks out, acknowledge it, and apologize to your partner.

2. Pay attention to and express appreciation for positive things your partner says or does–no matter how small!

3. Ask your partner to write down what makes him/her feel loved and special. Do the same for yourself. Exchange lists. Then, every day, no matter how you feel about him or her, do one loving/caring behavior for your partner!

4. Honestly look at the things YOU do that you know are not helpful to the relationship. If you want something different, you need to do something different!

5. Develop compassion for your partner and for yourself. Reactive, defensive thoughts, words and behavior are ways we protect ourselves from “danger”. Watch yourself reacting and ask yourself, “What does this remind me of from my own past?” and, ” What can I do differently at this point to become safer for my partner?”

6. Ask very specifically for what you need and say ‘why’ it is important to you. Your partner cannot read your mind and actually experiences life differently than you do!

7. Learn new skills that make communication safe and effective for both of you.

8. Know that both romantic love and the power struggle are not the destination, but are stages on the road to ‘real love’. Frustration and conflict are keys for healing and growth for both of you!

9. Read more books on self improvemet for new understanding of underlying issues that fuel frustration in your relationship and of ways to co-create a better relationship.

10. Most relationships can be ‘saved’ and transformed, and getting rid of the partner does not get rid of the ‘problem’!

Xiyan

We had dinner at a very special place that godpa frequents, called Xiyan. Its similar to a wedding banquet where we cannot choose the dishes and it comprised of 12 courses. Very special place, bit expensive if not for discount given to godpa who is very “friend” with the boss. Check out www.xiyan.com.sg

Let the pictures do the talking .. taken with handphone by my very talented Eric dear

Had a wonderful time, good food, good company .. a little awkward though, when I had a birthday surprise arranged by godpa, a very special ice cream cake of weird color (green n pink), birthday candle etc. too old to be cake cutting already :p

Nice closure to my 30th birthday memories ..

No 43: Have foot reflexology together

I love foot reflexology and massages!! In fact I am quite addicted to them having weekly sessions, as they play a big part in my physical and psychological well-being .. and was actually a bit disappointed to find that Eric could not appreciate it ..

Chance came… hee hee …

There were quite a number of foot reflex centres along the streets near the hotel we were staying, and each time we walked past, I was quite tempted to go in but I didnt want to go in alone and make Eric wait for me ..

I prayed that we will shop until so tired that he will be tempted to try it out and thank Papa my prayer was answered. On the last day doing our final shopping before we leave, he was finally tired enough (evil plan: keep walking bonus: heavy shopping bags) and yes we stepped into a foot reflex place.

45 mins later we emerged .. me feeling refreshed and Eric (..) he said it was a bit painful and couldnt understand why people like it. Sigh .. in my head was thinking aiya .. why didnt i insist on getting Mr. No.75 who was my masseur to massage him instead of the lady masseur ..

Lost my chance to get him to like foot reflex and maybe the only best chance [bang head ..]

Surprisingly .. one day later .. at dinner, Eric said that he felt better with the foot massage, felt more energetic and productive and even suggested looking for a good place in Singapore for regular sessions. YAAEEHHH!!!!!!!!!

No 42: Sheesha and Drinks at Starhill

Its quite a small world, we actually bumped into my very good sister Crystal and her husband while doing midnight shopping in KL. Of all places and time, our paths actually crossed like that .. amazing ..

And of course, being my bellydance kaki, how can we miss out sheesha and arabian music at the ultra sensual place in front of Starhill. Four of us shared a magical night of sharing and laughter, complimented by cool drinks and aromatic smoke .. mesmerizing ..

Almost unwilling for the session to end .. almost .. if not for the aching muscles and the beckoning of a comfortable bed and a soothing hot bath ..

No 41: Shop together at KL

Decided its not such a bad idea to go shopping together .. having someone to give opinion on what is nice or not    though it really takes some getting used to

Hee my dear also have pretty impressive shopping prowess, think he got a year’s worth of clothes at just 2 shops, talk about saving time … havent seen a guy that can shop like that .. but then again havent met any guy who likes to shop at all .. 

I do like the variety and what was on offer at the shopping centres in KL, got quite a bit of stuff myself actually filled up my luggage bag too .. my favorite buy being a snow white angel bear theme skin for my precious ipod, gift from Eric. Had been wanting a skin to protect it cos its white silver, scared to get it dirty with such a klutz as the owner :p

Would love to go back again to shop and eat its pretty cool

No. 40: Attend an overseas church wedding

Very nice charming wedding we attended at KL, love the whole heartwarming scene, the groom sang a song that he wrote and teared while singing, moving the bride to tears at the same time … lovely …

Very creative theme, 07/07/2007 where they played with the dates to create a logo with their surnames for the wedding … can tell they really put in quite a bit of effort into it … definitely unforgettable …

The lunch was a bit too long though food was really nice … not to mention I managed to take a sneak video of my dear dozing off at the banquet … very cute very funny … :p

No. 39: Take VIP Coach to KL

Took coach by Transtar down to KL to attend Eric’s friend’s wedding. On way there, coach broke down, took us 8 hours to reach KL and poor Eric had to sit besides the driver on the subsitute bus …

Totally spoilt my mood and wanna lament why us??? on my first coach trip to KL, though the ever sunny Eric definitely diffused the mood… “if gonna be stuck, will rather be stuck with you my loved one” and “being stuck at a place with baskinrobins is not so bad” … charmer … when will I ever be bored when with him I wonder …

Later then I realized that Transtar is well-known for breakdowns and delays …. #@$%& …. not to mention lousy service for making Eric sit at the helper’s seat when we actually paid for VIP coach!!!

Definitely ban Transtar from this day onwards .. Down with bad management and service!!!

No. 38: Mustafa Shopping at Midnite! – Done

It’s abt 10pm and I needed to settle some purchase, and I remember Sally telling me, “Mustafa is 24hrs” So after letting her wait for an hour (sorry dear) I went over to pick her up and reached Mustafa at Little India at midnite. You guys won’t believe what I saw, the ground floor was still quite packed and you can find almost anything there! Amazing! next time pictures as proof!

What’s interesting was it was raining heavily, and Sally cheekily said we should have something to eat while waiting for the rain to stop. The mustafa cafe had quite nice Tea (perhaps it was cold and anything hot then would be nice) and the Mustafa Chicken Burger was quite tasty I must say
If you’ve heard of Mustafa, but never been, it’s really quite an adventure…

(meanwhile, after the food, the rain still went on :p.. )

The Magic of Thinking Big

The purpose of a relationship is to support each other, through times of ups and downs … so in a way, I try my best to inspire myself, so that I can be a pillar to my love … an inspiring passage …   

Key concepts taken from the book The Magic of Thinking BIG by David J. Schwartz, PhD.

 

1. A person is a product of his own thoughts. Believe Big and grow big.

2. The size of your success is determined by the size of your belief.

3. Your training is self-administered. There will be no one standing over your shoulder telling you what to do and how to do it.

4. Study the lives of successful people and you’ll discover this: all the excuses made by the mediocre fellow could be but aren’t made by the successful person.

5. Refuse to talk about your health. The more you talk about an ailment, even the common cold, the worse it seems to get. Talking about bad health is like putting fertilizer on weeds. Besides, talking about your health is a bad habit. It bores people.

6. Einstein taught us a big lesson. He felt it was more important to use your mind to think than to use it as a warehouse for facts.

7. There is within each of a desire to be right, think right, and act right. When we go against that desire we put a cancer in our conscience. The cancer grows and grows by eating away at our confidence. Avoid doing anything that will cause you to ask yourself, “Will I get caught? Will they find out? Will I get away with it?”

8. A big smile gives you confidence. A big smile beats fear, rolls away worry, defeats despondency.

9. Make a supreme effort to put only positive thoughts in your memory bank. Don’t let negative, self-deprecatory thoughts grow into mental monsters. Simply refuse to recall unpleasant events or situations.

10. Practice doing what your conscience tells you is right. This prevents a poisonous guilt complex from developing. Doing what’s right is a very practical rule for success.

11. Make everything about you say, “I’m confident, really confident. “Practice these little techniques in your day to day activities. . Be a “front-seater. ” . Make eye contact. . Walk 25 percent faster. . Speak up. . Smile big.

12. Where success is concerned, people are not measured in inches, or pounds, or college degrees, or family background; they are measured by the size of their thinking. How big do we think determines the size of our accomplishments.

13. The only thing that counts about one’s vocabulary, is the effect his words and phrases have on his own and others thinking.

14. Practice adding value to things. Ask, “What can I do to make myself more valuable today?”

15. The real test of a speaker is not did he stand straight or did he make any mistakes in grammar, but rather did the audience get the points he wanted to put across.

16. The big thinkers approach to work is looking for more ways and things to do, especially helping others; whereas the petty thinkers approach is looking for ways to avoid work.

17. The big thinkers approach to companionship is surrounding himself with persons with large, progressive ideas; whereas the petty thinkers approach is to surround himself with petty thinkers.

18. Creative thinking is simply finding new, improved ways to do anything. When you believe, your mind finds ways to do.

19. Believe it can be done. Eliminate the word impossible from your thinking and speaking vocabularies. Impossible is a failure word.

20. “Average” people have always resented progress.

21. Become receptive to ideas. Welcome new ideas. Destroy those thought repellants: “Won’t work,” “Can’t be done,” “It’s useless,” and “It’s stupid.”

22. Be an experimental person. Expose yourself to new restaurants, new books, new theaters, new friends; take a different route to work some day, take a different vacation this year, do something new and different this week-end.

23. Be progressive, not regressive. Not, “That’s the way we did it where I used to work so we ought to do it that way here” but “ How can we do it better than we did where I used to work?”

24.“How can I improve the quality of my performance? How can I do better?” Successful people know this and they are always searching for a better way. A successful person doesn’t ask, “Can I do it better?” He knows he can. So he phrases the question: “How can I do it better?”

25. It isn’t so much what you know, it’s when you start that matters. It’s what you learn and put to use after you open your doors that counts most. “How can I increase my personal efficiency?”

26. Capacity is a state of mind. How much we can do depends on how much we think we can do. When you really believe you can do more, your mind thinks creatively and shows you the way.

27. Figure out how you can increase your personal efficiency. I sat down got a pencil and started writing down every idea I could think of. Capacity is indeed a state of mind.

28. Top-level leaders in all walks of life spend much more time requesting advice than they do in giving it. Before a top man makes a decision, he asks, “How do you feel about it?” “What do you recommend?” “What would you do under these circumstances?” “How does this sound to you?”

29. A leader is a decision-making human machine. Now, to manufacturer anything, you’ve got to have raw material. In reaching creative decisions, the raw materials are the ideas and suggestions of others.

30. Don’t let ideas escape. Write them down. Everyday lots of good ideas are born only to die quickly because they aren’t nailed to paper.

31. Don’t let tradition paralyze your mind. Be receptive to new ideas.

32. Ask yourself daily, “How can I do better?” There is no limit to self-improvement.

33. Ask yourself, “How can I do more?” Capacity is a state of mind. Asking yourself this question puts your mind to work to find intelligent short-cuts.

34. Remember: Big people monopolize the listening; small people monopolize the talking.

35. Stretch your mind. Get stimulated. Associate with people who can help you think of new ideas, new ways of doing things.

36. Others see in us what we see in ourselves. We receive the kind of treatment we think we deserve.

37. Use clothing as a tool to lift your spirits, build confidence. A soldier feels and thinks like a soldier when he is in uniform. A woman feels more like going to a party when she is dressed for a party.

38. Think your work is important. There’s a story often told about the job attitudes of three bricklayers. It’s a classic, so let’s go over it again.When asked, “What are you doing?” the first bricklayer replied, “Laying brick.” The second answered, “Making $9.30 an hour.” And the third said, “Me? Why I am building the world’s greatest cathedral.”
Now the story doesn’t tell us what happened to these bricklayers in later years, but what do you think happened?

Chances are that the first two bricklayers remained just that: bricklayers. They lacked vision. They lacked job respect. There was nothing behind them to propel them forward to greater success.

But you can wager every cent you have the bricklayer who visualized himself as building a great cathedral did not remain a bricklayer. Perhaps he became foreman, or perhaps a contractor, or possibly an architect. He moved forward and upward. Why? Because thinking does make it so. Bricklayer number 3 was tuned to thought channels that pointed the way to self-development in his work.

39. Like your appearance, the way you think toward your work says things about you to your superiors, associates, and subordinates.

40. A person who thinks his job is important receives mental signals on how to do his job better; and a better job means more promotions, more money, more prestige, more happiness.

41. You are judged by the company you keep. Fellow workers are not all alike. Some are negative others are positive.

42. Grow the you-are-important attitude. Everyone has a natural desire to feel he is “somebody.” The desire to be important is man’s strongest, most compelling non-biological hunger.

43. Practice appreciation because a person craves praise. He wants to be assured he is doing a good job and that he is important.

44. Don’t hog glory, Invest it instead.

45. Results come in proportion to enthusiasm invested. Dig into it deeper. When you find yourself disinterested in something, dig in and learn more about it. This sets off enthusiasm.

46. Show appreciation at every opportunity. Success depends on the support of other people.

47. Be a comfortable person so there is no strain in being with you.

48. Give spiritual strength to people, and they will give genuine affection to you.

49. A wise man will be Master of His Mind; A Fool will be Its Slave.